My first ever call to Poison Control.

Monday night, I found Olivia in the corner eating something.

It turned out to be a sponge for Dominic’s shoe shiner.

Usually, we keep Dominic’s shoe shiner in a little drawer in our coffee table. Olivia likes to play with it when she comes across it. It’s always sealed shut, and it’s pretty hard for her to get it opened, if she tried, which she doesn’t. She usually just bangs it against the coffee table to hear the loud sound, which we don’t mind. I think she went to do the same thing this time, but realized that it was a different texture than usual, liked that it was soft, and put it in her mouth.

I think that it was an honest mistake on Dominic’s part. I mean, we all know that he would never do anything to purposely hurt her, obviously. I’m sure that he was rushing to clean the house (as we do when his parents, or my family, or really anyone, comes over), didn’t even realize that the lid wasn’t on the shoe shiner, and just put it in its usual spot in the drawer.

In all honesty, I didn’t even think to contact Poison Control first. Instead, I called our doctor’s office (well first I called my grandma), who then directed me to poison control.

I was so ashamed to have to even make the call, but the woman who helped me was really nice….and it didn’t sound like there was any judgement in her voice, which was a plus. She told me that as long as Olivia was still drinking/eating and wasn’t showing any signs of being bothered or in pain, that she was most likely fine, but just to watch her for a few hours. Thank god.

As soon as I got off the phone with Poison Control, I sent a text to Dominic and said “We really need to start watching what is in Olivia’s reach. Anything that we wouldn’t put in our mouths, shouldn’t be in reach for her to be able to put in hers.”

I then realized that although Dominic and I have child proofed, and made sure that the really dangerous stuff was either out of reach, or correctly locked/covered up, we quickly forget that the small stuff needs to be checked (and re-checked) just as much. We didn’t even think twice about putting the shoe shiner in the coffee drawer, which she goes in every. single. day.

I have already started going through the whole house, at Olivia’s level, on all fours, and re-checked to see what she can get to at her reach. We plan on re-re-checking, again, this weekend (as well as get some spring cleaning done, hopefully!) because although the woman on the other end of that line was super super nice, and calm, and helpful. I hope to never have to call them again.

Have you ever had to call poison control for your little one?

xo,

Katie

P.S. you should always have the Poison Control number handy. On your fridge, in your cell phone and even on your computer. In case you don’t know it, the number is 1-800-222-1222

P.P.S A picture of Olivia, for good measure. She was having a hard time staying asleep in her crib last night, so I let her sleep on the couch while I wrote and listened to Pandora (please run and check out the Lumineers Station for calm, beautiful music, and/or the Jimmy Eat World Station for a bit of High School nostalgia…I usually switch off every couple of songs so that I can enjoy the best of both!). Also, do sleeping baby pictures ever get old? Nope.

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A Mom Lesson.

So last week, I had a major mom (fail) moment.

Let me start by saying that Olivia has a blocked tear duct, which basically means she’s producing a lot of tears and majority of them are being blocked, not allowing them to flow through, thus making her have super watery/teary eyes. I constantly get asked why she’s just been crying and 98% of the time, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with her. The worst is when her eyes tear during the night, and she wakes up with one eye completely glued shut. This has been going on for as long as I can remember, I believe since she’s been about 2 months, and the doctor said that there was nothing they could do about it until she was one. Which brings us to my story.

Last Thursday, Olivia FINALLY had an appointment to go to the eye doctor. It was at 7:30 at night and all day I kept reminding myself because I have a terrible memory. Olivia had been a little punk all afternoon, and I needed to borrow Dominic’s mom’s car to get to said appointment. The weather was TERRIBLE. It was raining, and snowing and so icy, and there were so many accidents. His mom drove all the way out of her way to bring me her car, and when I put Olivia in her car seat, she screamed all the way to the appointment. If you’re a mom, you know how it feels when you’re the only one in the car and your child is screaming bloody murder in the back and there’s nothing you can do about it but turn on the music and pray your child loves the song that’s on. If you’re not a mom, well, then trust me when I say that it’s just a terrible feeling. So of course that didn’t help the mood that I was in. Once we got to the hospital, I called the doctor’s office to see what building they were in, as it was our first time there. I didn’t want to keep dragging Olivia in and out of the different buildings, the weather was way to awful for that nonsense. The operator proceeded to tell me that the last doctor leaves for the day at 6pm. Um…….what? How in the hell is that possible when Olivia’s appointment -that we had been waiting to go to for TWO MONTHS- is at 7:30pm? The operator said, “You can go in to the outpatient center, 4th floor, to check and see if someone is there, but here in my notes it says that the clinic is already closed.” Thanks, lady, I will do that. So I go up to the 4th floor, and it was a ghost. town. Needless to say, I was absolutely livid. I just made Dominic’s mom bring her car to me, I dragged my crabby screaming child out in this horrific Chicago weather, and I don’t get to have her eyes checked? Oh hell no. These people were definitely getting the bitch-out call of the century the next morning.

That night, I went home, still so aggravated, and so. freakin. exhausted. I put Olivia to sleep, and came on the couch and just sat there. After a few minutes, I logged onto my computer and saw a little post-it note in the corner. It read, ’15 months c/u Feb. 28th 7:30pm’. Olivia had her eye appointment at the beginning of the month, and her 15 month wellness check up at the end of the month. One was at 8:30am, one was at 7:30pm. And then, I came to the realization of the century:

I got the appointment dates and their times mixed up.

I just sat there, and stared at my computer screen. I couldn’t believe it. I am always on top of anything that has to do with Olivia. I’ve always been early to her appointments, always had the right papers, I was always prepared. How could I get the two dates/times confused and basically miss such an important appointment for my daughter?

To make matters worse, when I called the next day to explain what had happened, and to reschedule to see another pediatric ophthalmologist, they told me that there wasn’t another spot open until the first week in December…DECEMBER! I felt like such a terrible person. Such a terrible mother. My girl needed to get her eyes taken care of, it was up to ME to make sure of it, and I failed.

That night, Dominic came home, and he knew that the past day and a half had been pretty terrible, to say the least. Olivia was already asleep, and I was just laying on the couch. He sat next to me, and I just started crying. I told him everything that has been running through my head, and truth be told, there is a lot going on up there.

I started talking about how anxious I am about the wedding, and how I feel that there’s not enough time to do everything we want to make it perfect….how my family all seems a little separated lately….Everything and anything to do with Olivia because she is on my mind more than anything else or anyone else…how I wish my god mother was alive to see how great of a life I have and to meet Olivia….wondering how many people read my blog….Absolutely hating my body, I haven’t felt myself -physically- since Olivia has been born…money….time…life.

Sitting there, talking with Dominic, it made me realize that I really do have a lot of stuff on my mind. I’m surprised that I didn’t miss more appointments, or meetings, or parties.

We talked for a good hour and a half and I learned a valuable lesson (the hard way, might I add). Sure, I have a lot to do, and sure, I love to do all of it. But, I need to finish one thing before I start the next. I need to slow down and stop letting things build up.

As Mama’s, we think there is nothing we can’t handle. We think we’re superheroes. And we are. But even superheros need to take a break sometimes. That’s all I need to remember; I need to remember to take a break, clear my head, actually look at the to-do lists I write up and most importantly, stop being so damn hard on myself. I am going to make more mistakes such as this one (hopefully not as big). Everyone makes mistakes (especially superheroes), and that’s okay.

My baby still loves me, my fiance still loves me, and I love myself a little more for admitting these things. And that’s all that really counts.

Happy Tuesday, Everyone!

xo,

Katie

Oh, And because I didn’t want to post without at least on picture, you guys get one of a very happy, sleeping Olivia. I just wanted to get a picture of how cute she looked on our couch, and I’m glad I got this shot!

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P.S. In case you were wondering, I called the doctor’s office back, and I will not have to wait until December to get my daughter’s eyes checked out, just until the 15 of next month. Thank goodness.